Funny Company Buzz Words
Company Buzz Words
Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, and then leaves.
An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.
An office filled with cubicles.
People who always seem to have their idea generators running.
The online, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
Squirt the Bird:
To transmit a signal to a satellite.
A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce with no kids, no property, and no regrets.
A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.
People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in class; the rest were just tourists."
Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.
Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.
Euphemism for being totally stressed out, for losing it. Makes reference to the unfortunate track record of postal employees who have snapped and gone on shooting rampages.
The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. "Ask Larry, he's the Alpha Geek around here.
The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.
Chips and Salsa:
Chips = hardware, Salsa = software. "Well, first we gotta figure out if the problem is in your chips or your salsa."
Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon.
A "Get-Out-Of-Debt" job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.
Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying, but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.
The fine art of attacking an electronic device to get it to work again.
Euphemism for being fired. Heard on the voicemail of a Vice President at a downsizing computer firm: "You have reached the number of an uninstalled Vice President. Please dial our main number and ask the operator for assistance." See also Decruitment.
Vulcan Neck Pinch:
The taxing hand positions required to reach all the appropriate keys for commands. For instance, the warm re-boot for a Mac II computer involves simultaneously pressing the Control Key, the Command key, the Return key and the Power On key.